Lockdown- A time to be psychologically flexible.

For someone who is isolating already by choice, Lockdown is not much trouble.  It is basically ‘steady as she goes’. Similarly, if life has got you down and people grate on you like gravel, then being told to stay at home is almost a bonus.  Lockdown however, is definitely an incredibly difficult time for many, with long periods of isolation and inactivity. It may sound far-fetched, but If approached non judgmentally, lockdown can be the time you’ve always hoped for to put your life in order. It is a good time to learn to be psychologically flexible.

I do realise that there are exemptions to this statement.  If your mind is taken up with questions about paying the mortgage, keeping the business afloat, feeding the kids or seeing sick relatives, then clearly this is not the case and my thoughts are with you.

If, on the other hand, you are able to work from home and enough of your salary keeps turning up, then perhaps Lockdown is an opportunity.  I have lived on my own for quite a long time in the past, so I understand loneliness.  When I was my only company once upon a time, we didn’t have zoom or skype or even texting to stay connected.  I didn’t realise that the free time I had would be so rare in the future. I’m pretty sure I would have done more with it had I known.  This may be the case for you now.

Finding things to do

Finding things to do in Lockdown is not such a problem for your average teenager.  They exist in an unwashed world of computer games and digital communication already.  I’ve seen my teenager text a friend in the same room.  Added to this, not one teenager has been awake before midday since the whole shebang kicked off, so that’s half a day gone without even thinking.

Your average teenager thinks Lockdown is a chance to only have to shower every third day, wear the same tracksuit pants for a week and eat nothing but carbohydrates.  Teenagers in Lockdown have to do online schooling so they get up three minutes beforehand.  They’ve got this thing mostly figured out, but even they feel discombobulated in times like these

For those of us raised in, let’s say ‘a normal world’ of face to face communication, hand shaking and embraces, Lockdown is something altogether different.  We miss the interaction, we understand the importance of physical proximity and bathing.  For us, what is missing is the natural, organic and normal.

I would suggest that if you find yourself greasy fingered, sitting in a fort made of take away pizza boxes and watching youtube videos of stupid people jumping off perfectly good houses, then perhaps you are grieving your lost life a little. Perhaps you miss your friends, your morning coffee, having a purpose and being active.

Develop a new skill

That said, if you have accepted that temporary isolation is necessary and you realise that having this much time on your hands probably won’t come again, then try to embrace it.  Teach yourself to like your own company if you haven’t already done so.  Learn to steady your mind through meditation.  Enjoy the gentle creative process in baking bread.  Start that garden project you always put off. Do Yoga or make a plaster cast of your head.

Not only will you have taught yourself a new skill, you will have improved your own environment and be in a much better place to strive ahead when these artificial borders are eventually lifted.  Imagine for instance, how cool your work colleagues will think you are with a life sized bust of your own head on the desk.

Habit, the great liberator of conscience

This may seem a little flippant, but there is a real message here underneath all the silliness.  A routine can be your friend, or as my dear old Dad used to say “Habit is the great liberator of conscience”. What I mean by this is that when you have a lot of empty time, fill it with a positive routine.  Avoid too much down time where the mind can wander about and get itself into mischief by thinking too much.

Lockdown is the perfect time to learn mindfulness so that your mind is rested.  Stretch your muscles and walk so that you stay fit and eat healthy.  Set yourself a small period each day to read something useful. Keep a gratitude journal so that you don’t navel gaze too much.  If you drink, pick a night each week where you have a glass or two.  Don’t hit the bottle every night.  Be specific about it.   Be literal. Write your timetable down and follow it. It really will help.

Psychological flexibility

The phrase that seems to fit best here is ‘psychological flexibility’ or the ability to accept your situation with all its difficult thoughts non judgmentally. It is about being fully in each moment whilst not being controlled by regret and fear. Inflexibility in regards to your circumstances increases your chances of both anxiety and depression, so developing a new routine that adapts to your circumstances positively is a must.

Finally, if by chance you live in a house with teenagers, take this rare opportunity to spend time with them if you can handle the smell.  Talk about all sorts of things with them, not just about their school work.  Cook something together for fun.  Walk with them. Our parents only ever got this much time with us on holidays and then we were all off somewhere.  This really is a rare time where we all inhabit the same space, so enjoy it before it’s gone.

P.S Trust me, it’s best to have help with the plaster cast.

The subtle wisdom of Lockdown » The Good The Bad and The Unrelated

Colin Hay – Waiting for my real life to begin – YouTube